Three Words to Live By

New Year’s Resolutions.

We’ve all made them.

We’ve all kept them.

We’ve all broken them.

I am a huge fan of goal making. I’ve set many good-hearted resolutions with all the intent of lasting all 365 days of the year but usually by the end of January I was back to where I was on December 31st. The gym membership card gathers dust, the new books go unread, and the journals go unwritten.

One day my college roommate shared her way of setting New Year’s resolutions. She said that you find 3 words to theme your next year with. Throughout the year she would look for ways to use this word to help her. She also discovered that the following year seemed to offer challenges that allowed her to put these words into practice and become more of the person she wanted to become.

I LOVED this idea and so for the next few years, I’ve done the same. This year, I am so in love with my words! I’m excited to share about why I chose them and what I’m hoping to get out of this new year!

“Who looks outside, dreams; who looks insides, awakens.” 

–Carl Jung

I was out delivering Christmas gifts for my parents to their neighborhood friends. And if any of you know my parent you know just how many friends this would entail. As I walked from house to house I enjoyed the crisp air and the sun shining on my face. On a particular longer stretch of a walk, I became very aware that I was left alone with my thoughts. I shuttered at this realization and quickly went looking for a distraction. I didn’t want to face the unhappy thoughts that were sure to be lurking around the corner.

The entire day I was disturbed at what I learned about myself; I couldn’t be alone with myself. I needed to be constantly distracted in order to avoid the bad memories, thoughts, and worries of my life. I knew this needed to be corrected if I was ever going to ever be able to accept myself and be a better person.

“I found that I could not climb my way up to God in a blaze of doing and performing. Rather, I had to descend into the depths of myself and find God there in the darkness of troubled waters. That is the story of how I came dripping-new into the spiritual life.” - Firstlight by Sue Monk Kidd

I know I need to “descend into the depths of myself” and face the demons and the hurt that I’ve been avoiding. Rather, I need to get to know myself and teach myself to heal and cope rather than ignore and distract.

SELF-AWARE goals 2018 – I plan on applying this word to my life by learning the arts of yoga and meditation.

“The practice of meditation lets us be who we are as we are, without any shame or judgment attached. We sit with ourselves alone, bare, not to be judged, but to be accepted.” 

-How to Communicate like a Buddhist by Cynthia Kane

One day while in a class my teacher asked us the following question, “What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail?”

Sheesh, a whole long list scrolled through my head. As I imagined what an amazing world that would be to do so much and never fail, I came to the piercing realization of how much failure ruled my life. So many of the things that came to my mind were not too crazy or far-fetched. The only reason I never attempted them was because I didn’t think I could do it.

“Almost” by the World Within captures this concept unequivocally.

“I had to wonder how many times “almost” has gotten in my way. How many times a simple decision to stop, to not go, or wait for later has changed the outcome of my life. How many times has it changed the world? How many potential best-sellers were almost started? How many potential greats almost stuck with it? How many friendships almost remained intact?”

I have painfully pondered all of the hobbies, opportunities, or goals that I missed because I was too afraid to try. It hurts to even write that sentence and admit to myself that I am the only thing that got in my way.

But not any more guys… because this year I’m going to try. I’m going to at least TRY to do those things that I have ALMOST done.

“The worst outcome is so much better than wondering.”

TRY goals 2018 – I am finally going to commit to writing. I bought a book called, “The Writer’s Daily Companion” by Amy Peters. The book covers 365 inspirations and writing tips. Including, biographies of authors, writing prompts, editing lessons, and books to read. I’m SO excited to follow the daily guides of this book and write more.

I also enrolled myself in an adult photography class and finally learn an art that I’ve always been interested in.

Gratitude was the last word that took much more thought and prayer. Sometime before Christmas I was checking our Amazon account to track the packages that had been shipped. These were gifts for ourselves along with gifts for others. Quickly my search went from our order history to the deals of the day section. Before I knew it I was clicking that magical “One click to buy” option on Amazon.

On that same day, I was watching the Christmas devotional that the LDS church broadcasts each year. While none of the talks were solely about gratitude, the word rung in my ears and heart every time it was uttered.

Again, the piercing feeling that comes with being chastened came over me. I reflected on how many times I was disappointed because something didn’t go how I expected it. I saw myself getting upset when the people around me couldn’t please my every whim. I cringed as I remember times that we couldn’t buy things and it brought on a sour attitude that lasted much longer than the actual time I wanted that thing.

I knew I hadn’t always been like this. Most of my life I can remember not really needing or wanting much and being a pretty grateful person. But slowly the spirit of entitlement had been creeping in and poisoning my spirit.

“Everyone’s situation is different, and the details of each life are unique. Nevertheless, I have learned that there is something that would take away the bitterness that may come into our lives. There is one thing we can do to make life sweeter, more joyful, even glorious. We can be grateful!” 

–President Uchtdorf

GRATITUDE Goals 2018 – I plan to help serve those that are in need and surround myself with people who bring the spirit of gratitude into my life and are examples of being grateful in every circumstance. I also plan on becoming more minimalist in order to help me become less consumed with the things in life. (If you're interested in minimalism, check out The Minimalists blog or their documentary on Netflix. It will change your life!)

I wish everyone luck with their goals for the New Year in whatever form you set them. Let's all be brave enough to set goals and be daring enough to do them.