Treat Yo' Self

Anyone else ever start the week with all of these goals and ideas for what you were going to accomplish? So most of us.
Now has anyone else felt like life really kicked them to the ground on some of those weeks?
I'd take a venture that that has been all of us at one point or more realistically multiple points in our lives.

Well my week went more like the second one. I got pretty sick this week which halted much of my productivity. But we can all agree that the best part of being sick is binge watching Netflix right?

Now a favorite show of mine is Parks and Recreation. I'm sure you've heard of it, some of you may have seen it. If you tried to get into it but couldn't get through the first or second season, just power through. It gets so so good! 


Anyways, there's an episode where two of the Parks & Rec employees have a "Treat yo' Self' day. 
On this day they go to malls, spas, fancy dinners... the works. And even if the prices are high or the merchandise seems unreasonable, they do it because it makes them happy so they what?

Now I was thinking about this concept while I was laying sick on the couch. How important is it for us to really treat ourselves?

At work I heard a couple co-workers talking about the term "Caregiver syndrome". Afterwards I looked it up. While it is not an official medical condition listed in the Diagnostic Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. The affects of it are very real.

In the pamphlet, "Caring for Persons with Dementia," Dr. Jean Posner, a neuropsychiatrist in Baltimore, Maryland, referred to caregiver syndrome as, "a debilitating condition brought on by unrelieved, constant caring for a person with a chronic illness or dementia."

Peter Vitaliano, a professor of geriatric psychiatry at the University of Washington and an expert on caregiving, said that the chronic stress of caring for someone can lead to high blood pressure, diabetes and a compromised immune system. In severe cases, caregivers can take on the symptoms of the person that they care for, he said. For example, a person caring for someone with dementia may develop progressive memory loss.

When I was 19 my mother had a series of life threatening surgeries that changed her life forever. For several months she was in and out of the hospital and hanging onto her life by a thread. During her recovery I took school and work off to stay at home and take care of her. I gave everything I had to helping her. I wouldn't hang out with my friends, I didn't date, I gave all of my attention to helping her.

Now some can see that as being a honorable right? Daughter gives all to take care of ill mother. Sounds like a good book right?

Here's another one, Mom stays up all night

Or another one... Woman works endlessly on homework to get her degree.

I'm sure each of us have earned many book titles like these. And yes, while honorable and necessary do you see something wrong with this?

These patterns go on and on and on. Every day of our lives. As women we have a natural capacity to nurture, serve, and take care of others. But while we are doing that we often lose ourselves.

I'm sure we've all heard the saying, "You can't help others if you don't help yourself"

Well guys, that really is the truth behind it all. I know it makes us look so good and feel so good to serve and help other people. But it can get to a point of becoming self-sacrificing and that is when it is harmful to ourselves.  And then there's nothing left.

A Swedish proverb says:

“The best place to find a helping hand is at the end of your own arm.”

Nobody else knows what we need like ourselves. So when our fuel meter is getting low, let's take a moment and TREAT YO' SELF.

Go to the store by yourself.

Play a song that you enjoy in the car instead of the Moana soundtrack for the 80th time.

Take a long hot bath.

Take two of the samples at Costco

Honestly acknowledge your needs first and tell somebody no.

Work on a hobby you enjoy.

Create something.

Buy that item that's saved in your Amazon cart.

Communicate to a loved one when you need help.

It takes time and a lot of self-awareness and humility to be able to put yourself first. You WILL even feel like you're being selfish! But when you realize that you can't help others unless you yourself are taken care of, then you become a better asset to yourself and to everyone around you.

Instead of self-sacrificing let's first take a moment and look at our needs and then what?

That's right. Treat yo' self.